Most children start their periods when they're around 12 years old, but they can start as early as 8. Neurodivergent children and young people may need time to adjust to and understand the physical and emotional changes, so it's important to start preparing for menstruation early.
Talking about personal subjects like periods can make some young people, and parents, feel a little uncomfortable. Remember, periods are completely normal and natural – they're part of growing up. If periods are not talked about within your family, it can create anxiety for your child about what’s ahead.
Explaining periods, with clear descriptions and visual aids can help children to feel more prepared for what's to come, which is more likely to create a positive experience.
Talking About Periods
The earlier you begin talking to your child about the changes to expect during puberty, the better. Try to do this during smaller conversations over a period of time.
Some neurodivergent children will need time to understand the changes their bodies will be going through. Using clear descriptions and explanations of what will happen when their period starts (with reference to relevant anatomy) and what they need to manage it, will help avoid confusion and unnecessary stress.
When you give information about periods it's best to consider what format would be most suited to your child. You could use various visual aids to help support your conversation, for example:
If your child asks questions about periods and puberty try to answer them as honestly as you can.
If your child isn't asking questions, try to start the conversation yourself. You can use some of the tips below to talk to your child;
Preparing Your Child For Their First Period
No
one can predict exactly when your child will start their first period, which can sometimes cause distress. It is a good idea to make sure they are well prepared just in case you are not there when their period starts. You can do this by:
If you are concerned about how your child will cope at school, you can prepare by:
Period Products
Your child may be confused about the different products available in shops, how they work and how they feel. Talk to them about the differences between each product and how they work.
Period pants, tampons, menstrual cups and towels (or pads) are safe and suitable for children who have just started their periods. Some neurodivergent young people have particular sensory sensitivities to clothes so hygiene products can cause some sensory issues.
Talking through and explaining different options shows your child they have choices in how to manage their period and can help relieve anxieties. It might be worth your child experimenting until they find the product that suits them best.
The video below explains the differences between sanitary pads, tampons and menstrual cups.
Find more information about sensory sensitivities and helpful period products here
Premenstrual Syndrome (PMS)
PMS is the name for symptoms that girls and women can experience in a week or two before their period. It can affect anyone who has periods and the most common symptoms include:
PMS can make neurodivergent young people more emotionally sensitive which can result in increased likelihood of emotional outbursts, changes in behaviours or meltdown/shutdowns depending on your child's condition and their differences.
It can be useful for your child to begin using a period-tracking app where they can note feelings and/or symptoms around the time of their period. This can help to identify common symptoms and help them to understand when they are likely to happen.
If your child is struggling with their emotions around the time of their period, it can be helpful to reduce the demands they may be under and to encourage them to be kind to themselves and engage in some self-care. It's ok for them to rest and say no to going out when they don't feel like it.
Let us know what you think!
We've been working together in Norfolk and Waveney with families and professionals to put together information, advice and resources that are helpful to families. Let us know what you think, and anything we could change or add to make it even better.
If you live in Norfolk
You can contact the Healthy Child Service team by calling Just One Number on 0300 300 0123 or texting Parentline on 07520 631590. Our opening hours are 8am-6pm Monday-Friday (excluding bank holidays) and 9am-1pm on Saturdays.
If you are 11-19 you can text ChatHealth on 07480 635060 for confidential advice from one of our team.
If you live in Waveney
Norfolk SEND Local Offer provide information and advice on services for young people with additional needs in Norfolk.
Suffolk SEND Local Offer provide information and advice on services for young people with additional needs in Waveney.
Mencap is a national charity who support people with learning disabilities. They offer a free Learning Disability Helpline with advice and guidance. Call 0808 808 1111 to speak to a trained professional.
Kooth offers online counselling, advice and emotional well-being support for anyone aged 10-18, seven days a week until 10pm.
